Let me take you back a week ago...
It's December 28th, 2010--4:30 am. I felt my first contraction. Of course, I didn't really know that's what it was. It felt like a really bad period cramp, so I toughed it out. I only knew they were contractions because they kept coming, but only a few times every hour. I didn't try to go to the doctor because I knew the next day, we were planning to induce Jr. The plan was to go into the hospital on Wednesday, start the Cervadil to open my cervix and then start my Pitocin to bring on the contractions. He was supposed to be here Thursday afternoon. But my son had a different plan, one that had me in pain allll day on Tuesday. So, Tony made me walk around our little apartment, upon the advice of a friend. By the time I was ready to go to bed that night, I was still in pain so I decided to time what I was sure was contractions at that point. When Tony was in the bed with me, we found that they were coming every 10 minutes. I couldn't take it anymore, so we called the doctor and she told me to meet her at the hospital. The contractions were lasting about 1-2 minutes at a time and so I suffered that on the way downtown and it only seemed to get worse! It was constant agony by the time I was putting on the ugly, backless hospital gown and getting hooked up to all kinds of IVs and blood pressure pumps and needles and such. The nurse was asking me all kinds of questions about my medical history and annoying me with the details about things I didn't care about. I just wanted to know when I could get the Epidural. Then she tells me I had to wait until my doctor got there, who I guess was running a little late. So, I dealt with the relentless contractions for another hour or so until finally a man came in with the anesthesia. And when he gave it to me, I felt a relief I never have before in all my 24 years! lol. The funny thing was that they let me have this button that controls the dosage I want. So, if I wanted a little more I could give it to myself. I found that a little dangerous, but they all assured me that I couldn't OD on it, so I went for it! That actually proved a little dumb considering I couldn't feel my legs during the pushing part, but I'll get to that. While I'm waiting for the baby to come, I'm sleepy but I can't go to bed. I became a victim of the nausea I've been feeling, probably from all the drugs injected in my body. It was good to have my man there with me, Mommy and my brother came down that night. That really helped me remain calm in spite of the discomfort I felt.
Finally, it was time to push. And let me tell you something: LABOR IS NO JOKE. I was a bit nervous that I wouldn't know what to do, but the nurse told me the game plan. We were going to take a deep breath, push like I'm on the toilet for 10 seconds 3 times in a row, then take a break. I started out OK. I didn't think it would be so hard because I was told Jr.'s head was "right there" and "Oh! He has so much hair, I can put it in a ponytail!" But it was the hardest thing I've ever done in my life. Remember I told you I overdid it with the Epidural? Well, that resulted in dead legs, which made it hard for me to hold my legs and for Tony to hold it up. And because I couldn't feel anything from the waist down I didn't know if I was making any progress. When I asked the nurse, she kept telling me I was doing great, but I still felt his feet in my friggin ribs. It was really discouraging to know I had to push him allllll the way down through my pelvis from alllll the way in my chest! *sigh* Pretty crazy. To make things worse I became exhausted by my 3rd set of 10 seconds. AND, sometimes Karter would even slide back up when I took a deep breath in! That erased all my hardwork:( So, all in all I pushed for a whopping 2.5 hours before our prince was born.
2:08 p.m. on Wednesday, December 29, 2010 Karter came into this world. He literally burst out of me, if you can imagine, at 6 pounds 15 ounces... 18.5 inches. The doctor had to tell me to stop pushing (just when I got it down, lol) so she could catch him like a football. He was gray, slimy, and had a ridiculous cone head...but he was all ours and the cutest thing ever. I was worried at first because he never cried and he swallowed some of his poop. I didn't get to hold him at first because the nurses went to work trying to suction everything out of his lungs before it got worse. But after about 10 minutes, he started getting his color and being responsive. I've never prayed so hard. I didn't even notice the doctor sewing me up or anything I was so concentrated on Karter's health! By the end of the night, I was finally able to see my son up close and hold him. There's nothing like it. I was so nervous about holding him, but it's true what they say: when it's yours, all that melts away. I wouldn't say the maternal instinct came right away, even with him being 6 days by now. But the one thing that is instant is love I feel for him even more each day. He's right up there with his daddy already, and those of you who know me know I love me some Tony:) Anyway, I looked at Karter and he was so cute and kissable..so tiny. I felt like I would do anything to protect him at whatever cost. I thought about how I can't wait until he and I can discuss his hopes and dreams. I wondered what his first word will be, when he will start walking; what will he get his first spanking for? A whirlwind of emotions go through you at that moment, and for me it was all good:)
I have to say before I go thanks to my mommy who came right down and stayed with us for the weekend cooking and cleaning for us. She's going to be a great grandma, or GG as she wants to be called. She loves Karter just as much and it's obvious. Jr.'s had so many visitors since he's come and I'm sure he's charmed each one of them like he has me and his father...
And about his dad, Tony; he is my love and the man I know will be a great, wonderful, attentive father to our son. The man who was the perfect coach during labor and the most helpful to me during our stay in the hospital and when I got home. I love you and I know Karter does too. I can't wait to see what we can do with this one!
Now, I'll be starting a new journey: Being Karter's Mommy:)